Straya Day!

January 25: Workplace productivity is low, the temperature is up and so are the floodwaters if you’re reading this in Queensland or New South Wales (possibly on some kind of iPad flotation device, iFloat? Still better than the Costa Concordia’s navigation app “iTanic”). The whole nation watches as the day works its way to 5pm. It’s like the Melbourne Cup on a clock face; “and the minute had is resting at 4:59, but here comes the second hand, passing 10 o’clock. It’s at the 50, the 55, 57, 58, 59... IT’S 5 O’CLOCK!!!! It’s all over here for another year at the Clockwatching Cup. Pass me a beer, I’ve got tomorrow off”

The flag lowering ceremony was eagerly awaited

So I’ve read a few blogs and columns in the last couple of days about our annual tradition of taking a few moments (probably during office hours) to think about what it means to be Australian and what Australia Day is all about. We don’t do this thinking on Australia Day though, that’s valuable pool, beer and BBQ time. The usual questions come up; Who are we? Where are we going? Are we going to be ok? Are we too racist? And so on.

There seems to be a lot of concern about a bit of research that has been widely reported as “People with Aussie flags on their car: Racists”. What the very small report carried out by a few students for a research assignment actually reflected was more along the lines of “Leading questions in research makes conclusions easier to forecast, assignment easier to write. Tavern time also increased.” A bunch of students asked 500 people about their views of Australia on Australia Day. All these people were on the South Perth Foreshore and out of these about 100 admitted they have Australian flags hanging off their cars.

Of these 100 people, less than half admitted they were concerned about immigration, Australian culture, and had negative views of Aboriginals and Muslims in Australia. We’re not told whether this was Islamic Extremists, Islamic nations or even Islamic cricket players. Considering the news cycle at the time having a fair bit of coverage of boat people and various wars in the Middle East that had dragged on longer than The Lord of the Rings Exxxxtra Long Super Extended Directors Cut Collector’s Edition (with previously unseen behind-the-scenes footage of the making of the behind-the-scenes special).

The story apparently is that while a few people with flags on their cars were concerned about stories the media and Today Tonight/A Current Affair/talk back radio had been bludgeoning people with. Hardly surprising really. I’m shocked that there weren’t more people openly displaying racist or downright obnoxious attitudes. This IS Australia Day on the South Perth foreshore remember? Not exactly the place you go for highbrow political discourse. Punch-ons at the flag pole? No worries. Australia’s foreign policy and multiculturalism... not so much.

Speaking from what I’ve seen of people opinions of Aussies overseas, we’re not all that bad. You hear stories of Indian students being the targets of racism in Australia? It’s even worse in some other parts of the world. People like Australians, we’re considered to be naturally good-humoured and friendly. We’re seen as a friendly, hard-working nation with beautiful women, beautiful beaches, and politicians which are easily ignored. We have a strong economy, business is booming, people want to come here to work. Sure we drink a lot, and we sometimes get into fights. But on the whole we’re doing alright.

Aussie pride is a bit overrated though, be proud to be Australian by sharing all that we love with everyone else. Show people why Australia is such a great place, NOT why Australia is better than everyone else.  It’s not a race, there is no “winner”. Be Australian be being cheerful, good-humoured and hard working. Nation-level narcissism to be point of being masturbatory is the providence of Americans, and they’re welcome to it. They can have their redneck “immigrants stole my job” mentality and their loud-mouthed decrying of everyone else who is slightly different.

I’m proud of the fact the when we’re given a day off for our nation, we spend it with those we care about, we get together, we share food and drinks (sharing a meal is one of the most ancient rituals or trust and respect), we enjoy the beautiful weather of our country (once again, except those currently being flooded or cycloned, bad luck).

We’re Australia. We’re Awesome. People know it, we don’t have to tell them.

Happy Australia Day everyone. We’re doing pretty bloody good.

-Worst Guy Ever

PS - Fun Game: Drink every time some blogger or journo uses the phrase "navel-gazing" when talking about Australia Day.